Embracing transition

This week I’m trying to embrace transition.

Since finishing graduate school, life has been nothing like what I thought it would be. Sometimes, I feel down about the never-ending stepping stones that feel like obstacles crossing my path. Whenever this happens, I try to enter a new headspace.

Autumn has always been my favorite season. When my sister worked as an outdoor educator in the Catskills, I used to visit her amidst the breathtaking fall foliage.

This past weekend, I revisited upstate New York—this time with my sweet partner and a friend. We admired the amber-gold and burgundy leaves, exchanged music, read poetry, and breathed in the fresh mountain air. Getting out of the city felt rejuvenating!

On a walk, I stopped to watch the leaves floating down. They touched the water for a moment before being whisked away and carried by the river. I was struck by the image, like witnessing a beautiful lifecycle.

I thought of my own leaf deaths. I thought of my dreams. Of all the stepping stones that felt like obstacles, and I wondered: How could I think of them as beautiful encounters?

Observing the natural world has made me realize how I can be more present in my own life, even when I’m afraid.

Every good trip involves a bookstore. So, the next day, we stopped at several, and I came home with Rilke’s Book of Hours: Love Poems to God and Pema Chödrön’s When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times.

Both works are what my soul needed to hear, especially this excerpt from Zen Buddhist teacher Pema Chödrön:   

“The trick is to keep exploring and not bail out, even when we find out something is not what we thought. That’s what we’re going to discover again and again and again. Nothing is what we thought. Neither is mindfulness or fear. Compassion—not what we thought. Love. Buddha nature. Courage. These are code words for things we don’t know in our minds, but any of us could experience them. These are words that point to what life really is when we let things fall apart and let ourselves be nailed to the present moment.”

What are the words you need to hear in your life? What would it feel like to hear them?

I hope you have a week filled with gratitude and, perhaps, a newfound love of your transitions.

                                                                                                                                                               --Nikki